CLICK HERE FOR THOUSANDS OF FREE BLOGGER TEMPLATES »

Friday, September 19, 2008

A Bitching Post

*DO not start reading since the post would contain "impolite" contents*


Ahem*

I wrote the warning up there about 3 hours ago then left it untouched. When I was driving home from work earlier (bout 8ish PM), my mind was a turbulence. I was venting up alot of anger and frustration on many things especially on myself. This is just one of those days (male PMS). Anyhow, the warning above was meant for things that I wanted to write when the turbulence was at full power having need the curses such as fuck and stuffs. Let's see if I can still muster back the anger and frustration for this post.

Tic toc...

Tic toc...

Tic toc...

Tic toc...

Tic toc...

Tic toc...

I can't! But I can still put in the details.

When I was young and studying hard (maybe...) someone told me that I would get the chance to enjoy life when I finish my education and start working. I have finished my education (supposedly) and have started working, but I don't see which part of it is enjoying life. I go to work early in the morning, spent nearly 12 hours in the office working on something that until now I'm not sure whether I like it or not, coming home to study for professional papers! What is this?! It is just so lifeless and baseless! Study? I thought (and so I did when I was young) that once I finished my tertiary and begin to get my own salary, I wouldn't need to touch book (in a short term at least) and at least get to enjoy life as I wanted to more. I graduated on May, went on a trip for a month, came back somewhere in June, and what! Open my books for examinations again! And starting working! Honestly, I did strayed off my path in studies once in awhile but I was still pursuing it while hindering much tempts and desires. I bare myself with the thought I would get to enjoy life later. What I do notice now is things that should been done in young age, I did not!

My daily schedule is like home to work to home to food to books to bed and the cycle continues. Weekends? I don't even go out that often during weekends having most of my time spent in the house or sometimes in the gaming center. My lifestyle changed! It is not satisfying anymore! There are many more activities that I've been exposed to and am currently unable to continue on. Right now, my lifestyle is no different than a fucking nerd or a Japanese otaku sorta person (no offence)! If there is one thing I don't wanna be is a nerd. I lived that lifestyle before and am satisfied that I should pursue my other lifestyles. Speaking of being a nerd...

I'm fucking gutless (seemed to me I'm getting back on fire)! I've been in a deficit for bout years now! It's time to revolutionary process into something else. At least not a deficit! Our Malaysian standing and situation is in a shit now and if something new is to happen I do hope that something new might occur to me now! Back to the point, I'm fucking gutless and useless. Came back like for 3 months already and I did set my eyes on 2! But what can I say besides the F word. First one was like, "Oh, it won't happen. This and that. Not to forget some of the dumb rules!". I wasn't dare enough to give some hints. I did give but nothing on the big side. Not that she will notice. Anyhow, like I said, "Screw it!" Then I decided to try with the second one. And what?! The best I could do in a week is to just get a few messages and chats? This is so depressing! Quoted from a friend, "I need a chick! With a bottle of whisky too!"

The above paragraph did show how "wai lui sei" I am right at this moment. But some of you might not get the part of having someone next to you. Seeing someone who changes the beat in your life. Life might be thrill or still but having someone that enters and remixes the tune would just make a song out of it. Sometimes I thought back and say, "I didn't treat them good enough." Blame myself for it. Sometimes I'm just too stupid. By the way, everyone knows this but so far, the person who did remixes my tune alot was what alot of friend named as "the bitch" (Rain and Danielle being the main people responsible for it, not that I'm gonna argue it now) but at least I did get some of those "happy feelings" that you can't get normally. Therefore, I want those feelings (different people of course)!

Advices are welcomed but not of those that I can tell what you are gonna say just by knowing you and seeing your face! Would be best if ideas on courtship is given, I've seemed to have dried out. DAMN WORKING!

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

love thy enemy and may the alcohol drown ur sorrow

Jack said...

alcohol is for euphoria... too much of a waste for drowning sorrow...

love thy enemy? I have none...

Anonymous said...

i have no idea for courtship but you can ask seth to teach you. all in all, you just need more courage to do it.

Jack said...

dude...! Stop being anonymous!!! I know who you are and what you did last last winter!!! hahaha!

Anonymous said...

eh eh eh tell me tell me about your wai lui sei things lar! me damn kay-poh now! who're the lucky girls!

Anonymous said...

Just be yourself! Wai Lui Sei means forever WAI LUI SEI..(remember what you told me few weeks ago?)! Good is never enough! Tell the girl straight that you like her if you have a chance...then you will automatically know what to do next...hehe

Nothing is easy!

Jack said...

my memory is failing me! What did I tell you last week? Tell which girl straight "sin"? hahaha...

u know me la... tengok satu interested satu... tengok dua interested dua... tengok banyak...?

Anonymous said...

You're the man! Tengok satu suka satu, tengok dua suka dua and tiga dan empat. Then, just get all only in once or one by one. You suka hati.

Anonymous said...

haih..go die la u

sz

Anonymous said...

Hahhha, what did anon aka sz ( I assume?) do last last winter?

Aiya don't so geram la ur setapak kaki is back! Let's go shopping sometime this week. Studying and working SUCKS big time I guess all act sci students know about that. I think your friend meant "enjoy life" after you become your own boss and then get to work half day or something - which usually doesn't happen until you're 30++ or 40. :P

Courtship ah, just don't fall for bitches ok and remember i'm here for advices :P

Anonymous said...

hahahahaha ..i like ur last sentence michelle..hehe..

sz

Anonymous said...

mygroansandgrunts.blogspot.com is very informative. The article is very professionally written. I enjoy reading mygroansandgrunts.blogspot.com every day.
money loans
payday loan