I don't wanna know

Was listening to the radio while on my way back and somehow bumped into this song. Used to listen to this every morning while taking the train to college. Enjoy! I miss college times!

Hari Raya Day II

Today's the second day of the Raya celebration for the Muslim (also the second day of my holiday)! It's really hard to accept the fact that I won't be touching office for another 3 more days! Yay! Holidays are hard to come by once you started working. Believe me. It's that precious! Well, if you are the sorta person who is dedicated and absolutely obssessed with your work like Audrey then going to work is really a no brainer. Anyhow, skip the work topic. I'm on holiday! Should be thinking of other bigger pictures in the world.

Before, I do forget. It's Elizabeth's birthday today! Happy Birthday! Enjoy being ** (I know you'll appreciate the age-censored). Anyhow, I did promise to join ya celebration but was kinda busy! Hehe... Soon ya!

I did realize soemthing regarding this blog of mine. It lacks information! I seemed to be posting a lot of bimbo postings on myself and stuffs that I rarely post up some screwed up wild thoughts of wisdom that I usually did last time. Oh well! Maybe I just love to brag nowadays.

There is a very important information that I just remembered though. I haven't gone shopping yet!!! Due to unforeseen reasons, my shopping-mate (not gonna make her feel guilty by putting her name here but I think most of you know who she is) FFK-ed me yesterday. It's a good enough reason and I accepted her excuse. Anyhow, the point is I still haven't shop yet! Luckily, I was able to fill in the busy-turned-void day yesterday by going with Audrey and Shawn. Phew! Anyhow, shopping-mate said we're gonna shop tomorrow. So, keep my fingers crossed!

Coffee or Tea?

Went to The Loft last night. What can I say... I would only go there for a chill but never to dance. The music sucks max first of all. Anyhow, not that all these have any matters. It's my friend's birthday celebration after all. So, no complaints! Well, good things do pass by in front of our eyes sometimes and last night was one of those times.

I think the last time it happened to me was during college. Then, I was young, full of haste and lack of loads of stuffs. Now, I'm a bit older, less haste and still lacking loads. CUT THE CRAP!

I decided to let go of something yesterday and by night fall, I met someone who is soooo my kind of tea (or coffee). It's been awhile since the last time I saw (*hint: my laptop used to have a lot of her photos and I keep saying she's the most CUN) someone that instantly makes my brain to tell me, "She's your type!" Anyhow, all talks and nothing done is a no-no here! What can I do? Wait for a chance to come by? Will that ever happen? I doubt!

HELP!!!!

Hopeful

It's been some time.

Just an update.

Life's been so hectic and restless that I find no inspiration or anything to grunt about. Maybe after some certain restful sessions that I would be able to groan on something. Anyhow, am watching and downloading movies that U.S. has released but M'sia not.

Till next time!

Note: Am still hopeful!

My job

Wow! I'm back to bitch more about myself! I'm too full of myself lately! Haha! I don't know why so don't ask!

Anyway, today I'm gonna talk about my job! JOB people! Yes! I'm working!

Started for nearly a week now. So fast and it's Friday already. Still can't get use to the waking up early though. Feels super cranky.

So, some description of my job. I'm an actuarial executive for now with an income of RM**** per month while expecting a salary increase in 2 months time. Yay! In the actuarial department, I'm under the Product Development team where by we manage the products of the company (will describe more of it when I'm more familiar with layman's term). I did the same job when I was doing my intern in Prudential a year ago (they didn't want to hire me back I think. Poor me!) whereby I did loads of product error and quotation program error checking. These few days I've been doing the same thing! You can say that I just love to find fault with everything. Can't sit around quietly and comply with the order. Besides being a find-fault type of person, I had a few general tasks (not photocopying stuffs. Thank god!) that is to do with technical calculations regarding some new and old products! I'm only describing what I did so far in brief as I don't want to make everyone to fall asleep!

Now! For the funnier part! A year ago, while I was doing my intern, I mentioned I was in the Product Development team as well. The thing is, although I was in that team, I was assigned to sit in a different place! My cube was situated with the Branding team which was like 2 rows of cubicles away! I'm an outcast! Damn! Back to reality and present time, the same thing happened! Although not as far as last time, I still sit differently from the rest of my team! People just hate me sitting next to them huh?! I actually sit across my current team but the area I'm in actually belongs to the non-actuarial part. I think it's something to do with claims. Not that I discriminate them but because I'm still new which makes me not to listen to any mp3s for now, I've been listening to investigations and confirmations bout claims made! Not sure what I'm talking about? I'm saying I'm listening to, "Siapa mati la? Kaki patah la. Cancer apa la?". Practically all the dreadful stuffs. Luckily I haven't gotten any nightmares yet!

Yet another "history repeats itself" sorta stuff is I was frequently exchanged into other teams during my intern sessions. I was transfered to the Finance for awhile, then to the pricing or valuation team (not too sure) for another period of time. And now, my GM called me into his room yesterday telling and apologizing to me saying that although during the interview he said he's gonna put me in the Product team but he'll need to change me to the Pricing team in 1-2 months time. This is because one of our colleague is leaving which leaves an empty spot in the pricing team. Seeing that I'm new (I'm not sure) and haven't really enter into a comfort zone for the Product team,I'm the best choice to replace him. He mentioned to me that he'll leave me under the guy (who's gonna leave) for him to teach me the necessary stuffs for his position. Not that I hate it to be transferred (I actually kinda like the Pricing team because somewhere in the word pricing, there's a tinge of coolness in it), but don't you all get the idea of me getting thrown around like a rugby ball? Anyway, hooray for me to be changed into a cool team (I think).

I mentioned in my last post that I have a new look and loads have been wondering how I look like. Like I said, I don't have any new pictures to post for now because my photographer has been busy to take a picture for me. Be patient ya! I know everyone's dying to see my good looking me!

Speaking of being vain here, I think I'm gonna write up on style and impression in my next post. Yee Ming had written something about these and has gotten quite a huge feedback from it. So, I'm just gonna hop along his footsteps and talk something related to it. Not that I'll follow exactly but something near there. Just wanna speak out what I think!

That's all the bitching from today!

See ya!

One... Two... ... Nine!

This post is gonna be a full rantings session!

I'm damn tired actually. Somehow or rather my body feels tired, my mind feels tired but I don't wanna go sleep now and wake up in the middle of the night cursing, "Damn it!" I'm gonna start my new job tomorrow so it's best to show a fresh impression on the first day. Later days, we'll see!!! :P

Did lots of stuffs today. Woke up late (probably around 11am) and went out straight after I came out from the shower (of course I dried myself up and putting on some clothes). First stop, mom's office because she forgot to clear some of her stuffs yesterday. Second stop, bank because mom needed to do some banking. Third stop, was lunch. Delicious "mee rebus"! That was satisfying! Fourth stop, auntie's house because my dad's helping my cousin for his air-ticket to Canada. He's gonna go to Canada in the middle of August for his studies. I come back, he leave! Does it make sense? NO! He's gonna have his farewell party tomorrow night and he said he's gonna intro some "friends" to me! Woohoo! I think he wants me to take care of his "friends". Haha... Fifth stop, Mr. Yong's (Dad's friend) house because there were some pictures of Eastern Europe trip that were in his laptop which we needed to copy.Sixth stop, and by far the best, my another cousin brother's place to book for my new car! Yay! As for what car it is, try guessing! Aaron! We're gonna drive behind the same wheels! Car's gonna be ready by September I think. So for those who wanna book me, please tell my secretary (I've yet to interview one). Seventh stop was the optician. I'm getting a new pair of spectacles! Still don't dare to try contact lenses but good also since my "san gwong" (aesthete...correct me if this is wrong) is still there (damn it!). I'm gonna look nerdier! I hope not! Haha... For everyone's info, I have the same optician as Mahathir! Haha... Eighth stop, dinner! Yummy is the word! Taste and description, everyone has their say right! Ninth and final stop is home! To shower, to poo, to online and rant about my day!

The end!

A Series of Nightmare

I know that this post is kinda out of what I'm supposed to be posting about which is "Love or Lust" but I definitely have ta blog this!

I slept early last night thinking that I need to wake up early for my class tomorrow. So I pull my blanket plus comforter (it was shit cold) and tug myself comfortably in it. As I drool and doze of into my sleep, my series of nightmares began!

• I had a dream that my friend's girl (note: I'm not sure which friend's so no hard feelings) was like a super-glue sticking to me every moment like a bug. It was kinda annoying (in that dream my friend's fury eyeballs were shooting at me)
• I was having dinner with my family and suddenly I was sitting on a different table. When I realized I was just on the upper floor of the restaurant I tried to go down back to my family's table but failed. Somehow a series of stupid and threatening events kept preventing me from going downstairs.
• I had a gun in my hand and there was a body sprawling on the ground with no blood oozing out surprisingly. Police sirens were every where and I ran. As I ran the scene changes again to the longest nightmare of all last night
• I was a boxer (fighter perhaps) and was on the run. I was running away from a group of people that I just fought and they were seeking me for revenge or what ever I do not know. I ran into a hideout of another group of fighters. However, luckily this group of people were kind to let me hide in their place. They even have a underground cult praying center and a pagoda for housing. I was sent up to one of the rooms for rest. Later, one of the member told me that a higher-up of theirs wanted to meet me. And so I went to meet up the person but it was a long way up as I have to go through mazes to reach that meeting point. It was an empty unfurnished room. The guy (which was supposed to be the best fighter in the group) asked me whether I wanted to be stronger and I said, "Yeah!" Next thing I know I was being stabbed my super lots of needles and syringes onto my chest and arms. Pain!
• This event is still based on what happened above earlier but I was in a different body of another person as I watched the guy who got stabbed by all those stuffs shouted in pain and his body was getting bigger. I tried to run away. As I reached the door I took a glimpse the so called best fighter in the group has his head got burst by a blow from the now monstrous person. I ran down the stairs as I heard the monstrous mutated person was chasing me! Other members in the group just seemed to disappear. I reached the bottom but the door wouldn't budge (as usual...) and I don't know where the monstrous person was. All I had to do was to tremble at one spot!

I woke up! :p

2 Years!

Haha. . . Damn long never update my blog. I guess I'm starting to see all the vines and green slimy stuff growing on my blog. Okay! Time for clearing it up a little. What can I say. . . Finals next week and I only have 2 courses out of 4 that have finals. How fun is that? Actually not too fun since those courses without finals, gonna have presentation and projects due. Haha. . .

Time flies you know. . . I have been here for nearly 2 years already! Wow! And I'm gonna graduate in about another 5-ish months time. I graduate when I'm 21! Never had I thought of this when I was still in high school. I thought that my age of graduation would be somewhere around 23. Now I'm 2 years ahead of what I planned. Meaning I'm gonna start working my ass off for the great period of my life. Isn't that good and bad? Good: I get my own money without being a dependent. Bad: I miss school and all those extra hours plus working means working!

Anyway, half of my batch buddies are gonna graduate by the end of this semester which means next week! Half of us are gonna stay. I'll definitely miss them. Most of the closest friends I have in Drake indeed are from my batch. Was having "guy's pillow talk" the other night with Kim Ming (he's gonna graduate too) and Wilson, and they were asking which is the best semester that each of us ever enjoyed in Drake. Both Wilson and Kim Ming had the same opinion on the first semester was the best as everything was new and we were dumb. Haha. . . All those times of a group of us going to library or GK basement to study ACTS 140 which ending up quarreling between groups for 1-2 hours just for a simple formula. End up we did finish our homeworks and partial of required studies, but our stomachs grumble which therefore leaving us to my room in Morehouse cooking stuffs to eat. That was the best. Also, the number of Malaysian too wasn't that a lot Kim Ming suggested. Well, lots of stuffs did happen in our first semester and it was indeed happy, young and fun! Thinking of it, we do have less fun than when we were 2 years ago. Maybe we grew and become this way or simply because we found new source of fun.

To me, the best semester that I would ever have in Drake would be the semester where the plaque of not having cute Malaysian chicks dies. Haha. . . Kidding! I bet the best semester for me is the first year in Drake due to many reasons. One of it would I grew up most during this 1 year time period. I became from a person who only indulge in Utopian thinking to something more realistic. I gained the necessities to approach real adulthood. I made good friends here who I bet would last a lifetime too. I learned that I have friends here or in Malaysia who would always stand by me. I learned not to rely on others too much in life and to judge someone only by their outlook plus betrayal can be anywhere. I learned what is truly important to me. I learned that girls older than me in couples of years time can be quite attractive. . . *wink *wink :p
Note: Mom gonna scream when she reads this. My taste is so screwed up in the recent years!

Anyway, just gonna wish "ALL THE BEST" to all my departing, graduating comrades! Gonna miss you people! Don't act naughty and better not to forget to invite for your weddings in the future!

Nov 6th Year 2007

Tuesday;Sunny: Its cold out there today. Is it just me feeling this way because my stomach is kinda empty or can anyone tell me you agree with me? I would have love the weather even more provided its a bit warmer than it is. I slept well last night surprisingly. My sleeping pattern in the US isn't always in its best shape. What may be the cause of this? I never know. Maybe there is a cause mentioned somewhere during my psychology class with Mrs. Singh in ADP last time. Sorry I forgot. Guess I wasn't paying too much attention during that lecture only! Honest! I do participate a lot didn't I. Haha. . . Somehow all these stuffs attract me more than a normal actuarial lesson. So, I asked myself again for the 10,000th time this year, "Am I really into my major?" I know it is a yes somewhere in my shapeless soul. The yes would be the very cause of the answer NO too. I love to travel (perhaps that is what started this kinda thinking) and I just hate to be stuck in the cubicle of an office (an open office type won't be so bad). The reason I hate to be stuck in the office so much is doing work in an office is like too formal and closed for me plus a childhood memory of mine following my mom to office when I was young. This made me to love the outside of the office a lot and making more physical movement type of jobs.
Field works which are conduct outside in the open are usually the best job I can ever dream of but I didn't choose it. Why? The main reason is I like to do all of them! So, which is the one that I can do? I don't know myself. Another reason which is quite important would be I feel that I have the responsibility to earn more for the family in the future. That is why money is very important in my career's future. Okay okay. . . Actuary isn't the biggest money maker out there and I can earn maybe even more if I have a job in the open-field type. But the other option to me is more of an interest than to earn money. So that's why I chose to do something which I am looking into money of.
Just had a talk with Lili. Yes! I typed part of this post out, went out, and came back. Anyway, she asked me whether I'm paying any extra attention to anyone right now. And my answer to her was NOPE. True indeed, I'm not dreaming or visioning anyone this semester. What a surprise some might say. Then the question goes to, "There are so many Malaysians now in Drake and a NO?" Truth is there is no one that I found particularly catchy in the moment and my taste is kinda weird sometimes. To me it all depends on the environment around you're having. At sometimes you might find type A a better one but in sometimes you might think that Type B is actually more interesting. So it all comes back to what you see is what you get.
This is a long post of craps. . .